What Men Should Do
be provoked into retaliating with physical or verbal abuse yourself.
talk to your doctor about your health and seek medical attention for any injuries. If you are seeing a mental health counselor, tell them about your domestic violence concerns. They may not ask.
keep a record of dates and times of incidents and keep copies of medical records and police reports. Take photographs of injuries. Keep these documents in a safe place.
take legal advice.
Insist that police record your injuries and take a report, and that it is recorded accurately.
Don't keep silent.
Seek out counseling for yourself, contact official domestic violence and victims advocates offices where available, and tell a friend.
Recognize that it happens to men as well.
You are not alone. However, you may have to "put on your male hero hat" and make an effort to find others. Don't be afraid to ask for help from others. It is not a sign of weakness; it is a sign of strength.
veryone website www.safe4all.org
has a list of resources which may indicate what kinds of help are available in your area. The SAFE organization assists victims of abuse regardless of age, gender, or sexual orientation, and its website has an online support/discussion group which you can join.
Counselors at the National Domestic Violence Hotline offer guidance to women and men
who are being abused by their spouse or partner. Call toll-free: 800-799-7233.
Plan for the worst.
Have a safe and secret place to go to, and have emergency money ready.
Don't make excuses for the abuser's violence -- get help and leave!